On My First Mother's Day

On My First Mother's Day

Real talk: There were many years when the days leading up to Mother's Day hurt a lot. It didn't help that the busiest time of the year for Compliment (beside Christmas) is Mother's Day. I planned ahead, making marketing campaigns to help others celebrate motherhood, sometimes through tears.

 

Looooong before I started this business I wanted to be a mom. But year after year, it didn't happen. I see now that God's plans for my life were so much better than I could have imagined and that I needed to wait until His timing was perfect. But I did not know this yet.

 

I did not know if I'd ever share the experience of motherhood with my friends. I might always be the one who was clueless about car seats and baby wearing and sleep schedules-- always the one on the outside of a club to which I so desperately wanted to belong. I thought that maybe it was just not meant to be.

 

I had long conversations with God, asking Him to make my heart ok with however things turned out. Let me tell you, that's not easy. Well-meaning people would ask me all the time, "Don't you want kids? You'd be a great mother!" Students would say, "you're already like a mom to me! You should have kids!" As if the thought never crossed my mind.

 

So when I found out I was pregnant last summer, of course I was excited. But also tentative. Is this for real? What's the catch? Is this finally happening? And to be honest, even now as I type this with my seven week old baby in my arms, there are moments I can't believe he's here, and he's mine.

 

Preparing for this Mother's Day at Compliment has been so different. This is the resolution to those years and years of heartache.

But know this: I know what it's like to not feel like celebrating, to feel guilty for not being more grateful for all you do have.

 

If your heart aches this Mother's Day, for whatever reason, be it loss or longing, I understand. I see you. You aren't alone.

 

I pray for your heart and in God's perfect plan, and the immense grace it takes to wait, trust, and accept. 

 

And for all you mothers out there: biological, step, adoptive, honorary-- and all you mom-figures: aunties, grandmothers, godmothers, big sisters, teachers, mentors, counselors-- Happy happy day to you.

 

Raising children is the most important job in the world. Thank you for all you do to make sure our babies grow up in a more peaceful, kind, just world.

 

With love on your journey- Melissa and Team Compliment

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